Rotten Fruit

I am shining a "lyte" on parenting today. There is a biblical phrase, "By their fruits, ye shall know them." I can't remember what book or chapter it is from, but I know it is New Testament. The quote is talking about a person's character and depth of faith, saying that you will know if someone is doing good by the results you see in their life.

The same is true for parenting. All the hard work you put in in the early years pays off when your kids get older. Parenting is an exercise in faith. You will not see the fruit of your labor for years, even decades. It is not fun, and you're not doing it just for yourself, but for our society. A good child will most likely grow up to be a good citizen.

Lately we have seen some scary examples of dismal parenting. The young man that was set on fire in Florida. One of the parents of the alleged perpetrators said, "Wrong place, wrong people." I was appalled. It is an echo of the phrase, "Mistakes were made." Something we heard a lot during the Bush years. A 15 year old child does not set another child on fire by accident. Not wrong people, wrong parents. Not wrong place, wrong choices.

The outbreak of youth violence has many perplexed. I see it as culmination of poor parenting, the desensitizing of young people to violence by movies, TV, and video games. If you regularly "kill" someone on screen, how much of a leap is it to want to try it for real? If all you see is violence as a solution to conflicts, how can you make an informed choice? If you are essentially raising yourself, who are your role models?

Then you have the Gosselins. You put your family on display for America. Let your children be filmed almost from birth. Portray yourselves as an ideal family. Then you hit a rough spot. Air your dirty laundry in every tabloid and TV show. Exchange accusations in the press. Bring your girlfriends home. Accuse one another of theft. They are a microcosm of what has gone so horribly wrong in this country. What ever happened to privacy? Decorum? Manners? Adult behavior?

Another stunning example of piss-poor parenting is the boy in the balloon. Here are parents willing to do anything to get on TV. They involve their son in a hoax. The poor kid has more integrity than his parents; when he is asked if the event was staged, he pukes rather than tell a lie.

What is our society coming to? My generation is doing all of us a disservice by trying to be friends with their children. You have to be a parent. But there is hope. Children usually do one of two things when they become parents: follow their parents' example or do the exact opposite. Perhaps these kids will choose the latter.